Wednesday, April 20, 2011

16 and pregnant

Its funny that the summer I got married I swore I wanted to wait 5 years before having  a baby, clearly Gods plans are not ours, they are his.
But I remember watching 16 and pregnant with my husband that summer thinking " oh my goodness at 16 I couldn't even think of anyone else but me"
I think when your young every year makes a big difference. For example 30- 35, those 5 years may not make a huge impact in maturity when your in your 30's, but from 18-21 whoa, those 3 years have changed you like none other.
Being 18 going to college, finishing college,graduating, I just knew I was a different person. My priorites where way different than my former 18 year old self, and although 3-4 years doesn't seem like a long time, it sure changes you.

Granted when I did get pregnant, at 22 I felt as scared as those girls on 16 and pregnant. I did.
I was not sure how I was going to handle being a mother. Then I remembered, even though I am young I had already done everything I wanted. I lived my childhood years, I never tried to grow up to fast, I had a great teenage life, went camping, had friends, ect. I never felt like I missed steps in my life.
Although I would have loved some more just hubs and I time, but the way we think about it, by the time Andrew goes off to college we will be in our early 40's, and hey some people get married at 40, so we will be able to enjoy each other all over again.
Not that we don't have time for us in the evening now, but you know just us, all the time, time.
Now I'm watching the new season of 16 and pregnant, and I always cry in the delivery scene, wanna know something funny, I didn't even cry at my own labor. I don't know why. I was very emotional afterwards. But during the labor I was more nervous that he was healthy and that no "surprise" something wrong has happened.
I still thank God so much for a healthy baby boy.
Bringing him home, excpecially this past episode reminded me SO much of my husbands and I first night home.
We had that high maintence baby, who cried and cried. It seemed like things wouldn't ever get better, and that i'd be up with him all nigh for the rest of my life.
We still are up at night and he's almost a year old, but that's life, and I'm going to embrace it as much as I can, trying to be okay with the fact that children are children and they depend on us for everything.

1 comment:

  1. I agree! I had my daughter at 29 and it was still kind of scary how it was all going to work out. You're right though, that small period of time of really becoming an adult... it's amazing how things change.