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I feel like im in a new completely different stage with my baby boy.
I don't know how to feel about it. I've been his ONLY source of food and he's been attached to my hip 24/7, now that he is sleeping through the night ( so far this is day 3) i feel like he doesn't need me so much. I know im being ridiciolous an my hubby thinks so too, but i feel like he's leaving my already... someone stop me before i become those crazy typical spanish mother-in-laws. I m not 100% sure on how the sterotype works for other cultures but in the spanish world they are not the nicest.. to say the least.
But i refuse to be that person- I'm just having a hard time with the transition of a new born baby to a growing baby boy.
Im going to be a mess when he leaves for college, or boarding school.
I went to boarding school from my junior and senior year Broadview Academy and i LOVED EVERY MINUTE! it was something i looked forward to since 7th grade when my academy in chicago used to go spend weekends for band fest or choir fest. Sadly due to lack of students and money funding from our religious administration the school closed down :( . It was a big school that could house 300 students yet there was only 60 or 70 tops by the time it closed down.
Anyway i hope my son can go to boarding school to enjoy the experience, although my hubby doesn't agree because he's never been. At the same time i don't want him leaving the house at 14 yet.
Im a mess i know.
I didn't think i wanted more children but the more im with him i think that a couple of months of getting through the newborn stage isn't so bad in order to have a cute little cuddly baby.
But i do really want a girl. like BADLY. I see all these super super cute things and i can't help but to wish for it. I want that connection between a mother and a daughter. Although i know its one of the hardest relationship to nourish, it would be nice to have my baby girl.
We already have a girl and another boy named picked out. Now im not sure WHEN i should have another baby, i don't want a HUGE age gap but at the same time we are not completely stable. Next year my hubby is going to get his masters and we'll be on a MUCH tighter budget. So im not sure 2 kids will help that situation.
anyways im thinking of writting my love story soon!