The Language Dilemma

So from my first blog you see that i majored in Speech-Language Pathology soooo language is an important thing to me, not only that but i am bilingual myself i speak both Spanish and English fluently. Now here comes everyone's question, " are you going to teach your son Spanish". Lets take it back to before i even had andrew, i planned on ONLY speaking Spanish to him. I knew it was going to be hard because my husband  doesn't speak Spanish (yet) but we can all learn together. Fast forward a bit and now my son is almost 4 months and i find myself in a problemoo. When he was first born it was strange to me to talk to him in a "goo goo ga ga " voice, but it also felt weird to talk to him like i talk to my husband. The next problem is that it did NOT feel natural to speak to him in Spanish. As much as i told myself all he would hear is Spanish i just couldn't do it.  You see although i speak both languages i feel much more comfortable in English and I've never been one of those spanglish speaking girls. I am now finally feeling comfortable speaking in Spanish but i speak to him in english. I'm trying soooo hard to get him to be bilingual but it is much.much.much. harder than i ever imagined ( especially if your the only one speaking in Spanish) but alas i will try my best. Also my mom would kill me if i didn't teach him, her exact words were  " i don't want him coming to me and saying WHAT GRANDMA". So my mission continues...